This post is about shifting our attitudes regarding the need to take a stand on domineering, coercive behavior. Beyond the justified anger and grief is a space for pride in the fact that we never give up on empowering ourselves.

We can all do our part by supporting protests of these injustices. That can take the shape of a march, but longer term work happens by joining organizations that work against intimate partner and racial injustice.

We often want to retaliate and give people a dose of what they’ve given us, but this does not maintain our power.

Intimate partner violence victims’ safety has always been linked to how communities work together to reduce IPV. Unfortunately, our society’s response to IPV often enables violence.

Being under a Safe at Home order is an oxymoron when it comes to IPV, since home is where you’re in danger.

A member of the Women’s Voices group posed this question. Her family and friends either criticized what she was doing or went into fix-it mode whenever she confided in them. All she needed was to be listened to, empathized with, and encouraged. We had a discussion in group, and I promised to write a blog on the subject as well.

I counsel everyone who is embarking on something new to expect feeling fearful. It usually feels like jumping off a cliff. All the insecurities we have (and we all have them) jump out to convince us we can’t make it.

If we’re thinking of leaving the relationship, we often want to get through the holidays and put off any decisions we’re contemplating, especially when we have children. That means maintaining our mask—putting on a pretend face with family, friends, or others. I believe those who suffer from intimate abuse are the best ones to know the timing that is right for them. The last thing you need is second guessing from others who are concerned for you.

Consent is much discussed today, a very good thing. Learning that everyone has the right to determine sexual contact is healthier for...

At the foundation of violence against women are three basic building blocks: women have lesser value, women are property and the objectification of women.

June is LGBTQ Pride Month. The growing acceptance of all sexual preferences and acknowledgement that gender is not binary is something to...

When you’ve been harmed by an intimate partner, you want them to be accountable for their behavior. You may spend a lot of time asking...

My last post, Domestic Terrorism, recognized the similarity between prisoner of war brainwashing and intimate partner psychological...

If you’ve had an intimate partner hurt you emotionally, physically, or sexually, you may not have thought of it as terrorism. But I bet...

I'm back! It's been a long time since I've blogged because I took time off to complete a book on controlling relationships. My tentative...

Controlling behavior is the systematic domination and oppression by one person in a way that makes it clear that another person(s)  is...

There are two kinds of fear . One is the realistic fear that we experience when we're in danger. This is rational and self-preservative...

How fear plays into our internal predators is complicated. Looking at the seductive aspect of fear is not meant to deny the reality of...

The billboard “LOVE” is a huge draw for us. Romantic love is idealized and romanticized from the time we are young. The portrayal of...

The need for “ Connection” is one of the signs that draw us into any relationship, whether intimate, work related, friendship, or...